A big reason people like to go to college is to escape from their parents and have a ton more freedom. This inevitably involves dating as well. While in high school you may have been restricted by so many factors, in college, almost none of those factors exist. Or you may have never even had the opportunity to date someone in high school, which makes dating in college even more exciting. However, regardless of your experience dating in the past, dating in college can come with its own unique set of challenges. There is definitely a sense of finality when it comes to college dating, especially when considering just how many students are still finding their future spouses in college, something that is much less prevalent in high school. This guide will explain everything you need to know about how to navigate the college dating scene.
College dating gives you a lot of options
Unlike high school where you only had a handful of legitimate dating options, college is an entirely new beast with thousands of students who are actively looking to date as well. While this can be exciting to think about, it can also be overwhelming. One big mistake that college students make is trying to be too selective, especially for those looking for a long-term relationship that will last beyond college. However, that is not the right way to approach dating.
More people available means less pressure to find the perfect match. Dating in college also works much more naturally compared to high school, in the sense that you can literally just go on one date and not have it become a full-time relationship right away. You can literally date multiple people and just test the waters until you find someone you like. If someone piques your interest even in the slightest, don’t be afraid to date them and see what they are all about. You may even find out that you like them more than you originally thought you would. Whether it is a particular personality trait that you adore, or a certain quality that you admire, taking the time to get to know a lot of different people is the best way to approach dating in college.
Date beyond your comfort zone
In high school, whoever you dated was probably a part of your inner high school clique or group. But in college, that is not the case. First off, having smaller tight knit groups is a lot less common in college. But this is also not the case simply because there are so many new and exciting people to meet in college that odds are that your partner is someone none of your friends have even met before. With academic classes being much larger in general compared to high school, even someone in your class that catches your eye can be a complete stranger to you.
While college naturally promotes the dating of new people, it is important not to try and date within your comfort zone as much as possible. The tendency will always be to date someone in your dorm or someone that you know from a particular club or group. But dating new people can give you new and interesting perspectives on life. Don’t be afraid to date someone who has a different political view than you, or someone that has different interests than you. Having differences between couples is perfectly normal and in fact helps with long-term relationships by giving you and your partner opportunities to enjoy their own activities independently from time to time.
Or alternatively, you may find that you end up seeing your tastes change to more align with those of your partner, meaning you’ve broadened your horizons and became a more complete person by dating someone outside your comfort zone.
Take advantage of the free time you have
In college, classes are a lot more spaced out, and you typically have a lot more free time to use compared to high school, especially since you are not being held back by curfews or other requirements of living at home. Make sure to use that time effectively to go on fun and adventurous dates.
Now, this doesn’t mean going out to the same fraternities every weekend (although you can definitely do so if it is fun for the both of you). What you really need to do is to get off campus entirely and go out and try new things. Try a new restaurant off of campus, or explore a nearby hiking trail on the weekend. Regardless of where your college is located, you can always find new and exciting things to do that will keep the relationship from going on standstill.
Even if neither of you have a car, you can always use one of the numerous ride-sharing apps to get around. Lack of transportation is no longer an excuse.
In fact, if you have really gotten close to your partner, you can even take a flight out to another city and spend the weekend there. This not only provides the ultimate sense of adventure and fulfillment in a relationship, but also strengthens the bond between the two of you. What I mean by this is that it simply shows you and your partner that outside of the college bubble you are still compatible and able to thrive with each other. If you are very serious about this relationship, doing something like this is highly recommended.
(If you and your partner aren’t totally ready to go to another city for the weekend alone, make it a group trip with all of your friends to take some of the pressure off!)
Constantly evaluate where the relationship is headed
Once you and your partner go from casual dating to a fully committed relationship, it is always important to evaluate what you are both expecting out of the relationship long-term. While a lot of times both partners want the relationship to last and hopefully end in marriage if things continue working out, there are sometimes cases where one person actually is not expecting the relationship to last past college. Keep in mind that if your partner is of that mindset, often it has nothing to do with you personally but rather her own life aspirations. In any case, it is important to clarify the long-term prospects of your relationship. If there is a disagreement on the trajectory of the relationship, talking it out can at the very least help you or your partner prepare for what may inevitably may be coming (i.e. a breakup), or at the very least allow the relationship to end cleanly right then and there, so that you both can pursue new partners that more closely align to your relationship goals.
Take Advantage of College Dating While You Still Can
College Dating is an amazing time to explore romantic relationships while discovering more about yourself in the process. By using the tips above, you can ensure that you get the most out of your college dating experience, not only in terms of making successful connections that can potentially lead to long-term happiness, but also just in terms of personal growth. Good luck
